The Bathhouse and Massages

On Saturday night one of my favorite students, Lyra, and her mother invited me out for dinner with them. They said they would take me to the best BBQ place in Qiqihar so I was very excited about that. We headed there after class and naturally there was a big fuss about a foreigner being there. The owner, Mary, came and sat with us for most of dinner. It was a little strange at times because I had no idea what was acceptable or custom when going out with your student and her mother. They offered me something to drink and I didn't know what to order. Eventually they brought me jinjiu (a type of liquor here) and pepsi. Lyra's mother and friend were cheers-ing me all night, trying to get me drunk! They kept telling me to eat and drink more, until eventually I had to tell them "我吃饱了!" (I'm full!). The food really was delicious. The good thing was, because I didn't want to be rude, and because Lyra could only translate so much and I could only understand so much, I kind of just tried everything and didn't think about what everything was. From what I gathered I ate some chicken legs and cow spine, but I had to say no to the chicken heads.

Lyra and I eating some barbecue:

We were at dinner for several hours and I was able to use quite a bit of my Chinese. I think Lyra was quite impressed at how much I knew! She hadn't expected I spoke so much since I try to only speak in English with her in class. Her mother was very kind and said how if I ever needed anything I could ask her since my family was so far away. They already want to take me out for my birthday! I sense the beginning of a 关系. So they mentioned how her mother is the 'bosses' at a bathhouse and so we could go get a massage. I said sure thinking we would go in a week or so, but they wanted me to go tonight and then to sleep at the bathhouse. And, because I'm in China and would likely never get an opportunity like that again, I said sure!

So before I knew it we had stopped by Aoqi so I could gather my things (Lyra insisted on coming up to my room with me) then we were on our way to the bathhouse! I had thought we were just going to get massages, but first we went to a room so we could change (in front of each other) into these robe things. Then we went across the hall to this shower room where we had to shower in front of each other. I didn't even let myself think about the situation ethnocentrically. I really had to look at it from their point of view, where this wasn't a weird or uncomfortable situation at all, but rather they were showing me a great kindness by bringing me there. So I have now officially showered with a student...

After showering we went upstairs to have a massage. All of the people on staff (which was a lot for 10pm on a Saturday night!) have pictures on the wall with an assigned number. You basically choose your masseuse by choosing a number. Lyra and her mother were kind enough to give me masseuse 88, a very lucky number in China. So all there of us were massaged in the same room. I've only had one massage in my life before, but I imagine this massage was very different from other ones. It was painful. She did this weird fast hand rubbing thing that made me feel like my back was on fire. And she pushed so hard! I swear I have bruises on my back. I didn't want to be rude though so grimaced to myself in that face hole thing they have in massage tables.

Where you pick your masseuse:

It was pretty funny because they were all talking to each other in Chinese the whole time and I could understand a lot of the conversation. However they didn't know that so I got to hear everything they were saying about me (including how white my skin is). When they were massaging my feet the masseuse saw my tattoo (for those of you who don't know I have the tiniest silhouette of a bird on my ankle). Of course tattoos are pretty much a taboo in China. They think it usually means you're a bad person if you have one. They all gathered around to look at it and I could just see their opinions of me quickly changing. I had to explain that tattoos are pretty normal in the US and that my brother, sister and even my mother all have ones. It was funny for me because half the time I forget that I even have a tattoo so I didn't even think of it coming up as an issue. I think they were more interested than judging though.

So after that painful experience, which I hope feels worth it in the morning, we went to bed. Usually I don't sleep very well when other people are in the room, but I did much better than usual and slept through most of the night. In the morning Lyra and her mum took me to eat some 包子, which were delicious, but not exactly my idea of a breakfast food! I also ate this corn porridge and tried some bean rice porridge and pumpkin rice porridge (which was yummy!). I made a little joke because to say I'm full in Chinese is 'wo chi bao le' so I turned that into 'wo chi bao zi.' The mum laughed so I think it made sense!

It has been a very interesting 12+ hours but one that I'm sure I will never forget!